“Some things benefit from shocks; they thrive and grow when exposed to volatility, randomness, disorder, and stressors and love adventure, risk, and uncertainty … Let us call it antifragile. Antifragility is beyond resilience or robustness. The resilient resists shocks and stays the same; the antifragile gets better". - Nassim Nicholas Taleb
I am always looking for ways to strengthen partnerships and I found a great one in Nassim Taleb’s 2012 book, Antifragile. In it Taleb shares the fact that there’s a big difference between being fragile, resilient, and antifragile. His idea is highly relevant for partnerships and offers an opportunity to learn how to see challenges as growth opportunities. What does this look like in the real world?
A fragile partnership is one where there are fundamental flaws in the relationships. This can be caused by a number of factors – partners being forced to work together, or a power dynamic where some partners feel left out. When a fragile partnership faces a challenge, it breaks, either falling apart or simply becoming weaker – ready to fall apart at the next challenge.
In a resilient partnership, the partnership – and relations between the partners – are strong enough to resist challenges. The partners’ mental and emotional wellness ensures they will bounce back after facing a challenge, and the partnership remains the same. Resilience is an important attribute but misses the possibility of something even better.
An antifragile partnership is one where partners actually get stronger as a result of their challenges. The more partners are challenged, the STRONGER they get. Partners see challenges as an opportunity to get better, continuously learning, adapting, and improving. That growth mindset sets antifragile partnerships apart. So how can partners develop antifragility?
Antifragile partnerships have a strong sense of purpose and vision that boosts their ability to endure challenges. With every partner committed to the same purpose, the partnership is transformed into a more effective, cohesive, and higher-performing unit making it more adaptable, especially in complex and challenging situations. Partners find it easier to agree on a strategy in challenging times, but three key elements help them address challenges in a way that makes them grow back stronger.
Building an anti-fragile partnership requires a shift in perception, seeing challenges from a mindset of opportunities, not a mentality of threats to the status quo. And it requires clarity of action, openness, and a commitment to the greater good.
Perception: Change how you see it
Difficulties will inevitably arise in the course of your partnership. How we choose to perceive this challenge can reveal either the strength or the weakness in the partnership. Firstly, if partners react in a way that is emotional, subjective, or short-sighted, they only add to their troubles. If we can see things simply and straightforwardly, as they truly are –neither good nor bad, but an opportunity to learn and grow – the situation will transform into an incredible advantage.
Challenging situations require a deep level of trust between the partners, and this is not something one starts to build in the middle of a crisis, but the groundwork must be laid beforehand. See my blog post on how partnerships move at the speed of trust.
People are often driven by feelings that push how they act, feelings that may or may not be rational. If we see a challenge as an advantage rather than as adversity, we move from a victim mentality to a creator mindset. Victims ask, “Why me?” Creators say, “Now what needs to get done?”
Action: Act with deliberation, boldness, and persistence
Taking action requires developing a clear vision of what a better future could look like, and what the partners ultimately want to the partnership to create. How could this challenge be turned into an opportunity? Consider as many possibilities as required to find a solution and positive way forward. These efforts will require the partners to try new things, look for micro-wins, and build on success. Regardless, stay focused on positive steps forward and see every move as a way to improve the situation or learn (fail forward), so the partnership can get better.
Courage: Work with humility and cheerfulness
Challenges can be instructive and humbling experiences, providing a chance to be creative but also to comfort others. Partners must prepare for adversity and turmoil, but we must also prepare for the art of finding common ground, giving way and practicing cheerfulness even in difficult times. Think of the value of common ground and finding the greater good over the will to win at all costs. Which will actually stick?
When we dare greatly, as we do in partnerships, it is inevitable that we will get knocked down. After all, we must remember that our full potential exists outside of our comfort zone. If we play it safe, we leave much value for ourselves and our communities on the table. When we do this, we move into growth, not step back into safety.
Being antifragile is something psychologists call adversarial growth, or post-traumatic growth. “What does not kill us, makes us stronger” is a fact, not just a cool quote from a dead philosopher. The struggle to overcome a challenge can propel partners to a new level of functioning. This new level is achieved with a change in perception; clear, bold, and deliberate action; and a commitment to courageously acting, even in the presence of fear.
The extent of the struggle determines the extent of the growth. The enemy is any perception that prevents us from seeing a difficult situation as an opportunity or acting with thought and humanity. As Taleb tells us, and we would be wise to remember: “A wind extinguishes a candle but can fuel a fire.”
Nothing brings people together like standing around a fire. So, let’s build partnership bonfires.
¹Antifragile: Things That Gain from Disorder, by Nassim Nicholas Taleb (2012)